I created Living ROI as a passion, to share my experiences and support others who want to live more authentic, joyful and fulfilling lives.
Dear Friends,
This is my first newsletter after a three-month sabbatical. Several potential topics ran through my head this last week: fires in California, global warming, the obesity epidemic, social justice, capitalism, health and more.
I’ve decided to just share a bit about my time off, how I spent it and what became clearer.
In a word, the sabbatical was awesome! I barely glanced at email. A few times I felt guilty that I wasn’t replying to some emails that I normally would, but that is what an out of office message is for. I don’t think I even created a new Word doc while I was out. My computer stayed closed 90% of the time.
I spent my time in the physical realm: hiking a lot the first half of the sabbatical and then working on our new mountain cabin the second half of the time. I learned so much about construction. I can now plaster a wall like a pro and realize that basically everything can be fixed as long as you have the right tool.
Barbara at Silver Lake in the Sierra Nevada mountains yesterday
Significantly more than half my time was spent in the mountains, and often alone. I craved the solitude and had zero interest in making plans, writing a book or even reading a lot.
The few people I did see would ask me about my health, worried that I had taken this sabbatical because I had deeper physical healing to do after my cancer adventure. I didn’t. In fact, I feel 100%. Better than 100%.
I am immensely enjoying my life 50 pounds lighter than I was a year ago. I’ll share more about that in the future but suffice it to say that after 20+ years of trying everything, it feels like a miracle that I found a solution that works for me. It’s called Bright Line Eating. The weight loss happened gradually over the last year and was not due to my surgery.
On the very first day of my sabbatical, August 5, I had a follow-up doctor’s appointment and found out one of my blood test numbers was still too elevated. It’s CEA, a tumor marker used to monitor post-cancer progress. It is “supposed to” return to a normal range within two months, and mine was still elevated. That result initiated a battery of tests during my first month of sabbatical, all of which came back normal.
My CEA level is tested every month now. In September it elevated more, which led to a referral to a new doctor. In October it elevated further, which freaked me out, frankly. But, being completely symptom-free and having ruled out anything obvious, my wonderful new doctor agreed we should wait and watch. The next test results will come in this week. I have decided not to worry and trust my body which continues to tell me, and show me, I’m super healthy.
Before I started to write today, I didn’t think I would share the CEA story, but it just flew out from my fingers into this newsletter, so I’ll trust that too. Hiding it or not mentioning it feels like fear, and I am not, and do not want to be, fearful. As a dear friend has said, “Our bodies are constantly conspiring on our behalf and moving us back to perfect health.”
When I reflect on my time off, a few things have become even clearer:
- The time to live is NOW, not tomorrow.
- Don’t waste your precious time on obligations that are not your priority.
- Spend time doing things that bring you joy and with people who fill you up.
- Drop any expectations, roles or traditions that don’t matter to you or make sense in your life.
- Be helpful.
- Forgive yourself and others.
Tomorrow I start back at work, and I am relaxed about it. I appreciate the boundaries I put around this time and I am going with the flow of my commitment. The ROI team did a stellar job while I was out. In fact, our business has grown in every way, and they didn’t need to pull me in at any point. Wow! Thank you, team! I promise to come back with a light touch and honor the outstanding collective leadership of the team.
I didn’t leave one person in charge. Instead, the leadership team of eight worked together, respecting the value that each person brings to the table. We are creating a different way to lead and manage that is based on equality, trust and respect versus hierarchy and fear.
Thank you to those who have reached out to me via email, text, letters or through a desire to connect even if it didn’t materialize in physical form. I received and appreciate it all!
I’m excited to reconnect in every way! I feel full and grateful and look forward to seeing how the next weeks, months and years unfold, one day at a time.
