Dear Friends,
It’s Memorial Day weekend in the United States, and I am literally smelling the flowers and hanging out with my family. Life is short. We’ve heard it a million times, but, unfortunately, we don’t always live by it. If life is short, then for goodness’ sake, let’s do what matters most! We know that no one on their death bed ever said, “I wish I spent more sunny days inside my office, dealing with email.” Am I right?!
I love spending time envisioning what I want in my life (in all aspects) and then consciously making it happen. I’m good at it, and I enjoy helping other people do it. That’s what my Weekly Guide for Soulful Living Journal is all about. (And, you can download it for free, by the way.) When we let our traditional to-do lists dictate our schedules, we will likely feel a bit empty at the end of the day. A fulfilling life is not about checking things off, it’s about spending quality time in the present. Really, for me, it’s how I show up with each person I interact with, whether it’s at a store, in the office or at home. I am committed to bringing my best energy and an open heart to each interaction, which, in turn, brings out the best in everyone. Okay, sometimes I forget, but much less than before.
When my oldest daughter, Emerald, was 15, we were doing a vision and planning session as a family. One of my favorite questions to ask is “Imagine you only have six months to live. You will be healthy for those six months, but you’ll be gone at the end of it. How will you spend this precious time, and with whom?” I asked that question of Emerald, and then said, “Of course, whatever it is, you should do it now, because we don’t know how long we will live and we should do those important things in our life right away.” Emerald was quiet as she contemplated the question, and then looked up and said, “Well, I’d want to have sex before I die.” Just what you want to hear your 15-year-old daughter say! We all laughed, and I learned it’s better to hear what people have in mind before announcing that they should be doing it now.
Marina (age 11) and Emerald (age 15) in 2011 in Yosemite high country
And you may be thinking, “Well that’s a nice idea, to do the things I really want to do in my life, but I have responsibilities and need to make a living!” So how can we get what we need to get done, and live a joyful life? Let’s get practical. There are a few key activities that establish the best conditions for good living, and they aren’t a secret:
- Take care of your body (exercise, eat well, sleep enough)
- Take care of your mind (meditate, yoga, write, read/watch/listen to positive content)
- Reserve time every week for yourself and your loved ones
- Focus more on what you want, and less on what you don’t want. When you fill your time with positive content and hang out with people who are supportive and make you feel good, it will improve your life. The converse is true as well.
There truly is no secret to the good life. We’ve all heard it before. The only difference is whether we’re doing it. I am compelled to share a practice that has made a significant difference in my life, and I just started doing it five months ago. Meditation. I started with just three minutes a day. Using an apphelps a lot! Now I average 15 minutes a day. Ten minutes if I’m in a rush, and 20 minutes on the weekends. Meditation does for your brain what exercise does for your body. It physically changes the brain by increasing gray matter, among other things. Here are some of the benefits of mediation: reduces pain, boosts immune system, lowers blood pressure, cultivates willpower, builds focus and concentration, boosts cognitive function, eases stress and anxiety and improves sleep. That’s all?! I sure wish I figured this out sooner, but am thrilled I understand it, and experience it, now.
When I was a journalist in London, my boyfriend was a cameraman. Convenient! He had spent time in Thailand in a monastery practicing meditation. He continued to mediate every day. One morning I tried to meditate, and he said, “I can’t image you meditating. Your mind is constantly going.” I know he meant no harm by that, but for the next 25 years I essentially believed that I couldn’t meditate. Not true! So, if you are one of those people who don’t think you are the meditating type, think again. It’s never too late to quiet the mind.
Wishing you happy times!
Barbara
CEO, ROI Communication
Chief Catalyst, Living ROI
I created Living ROI as a passion, to share what I’ve learned and support others who want to live more authentic, joyful and fulfilling lives. Please visit our website.
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